Generational Interviews-Theater Style

Once again, the Stoa is delving into the theater of the absurd to describe in every day terms the differences between the generations.

History shapes our interpretation of ourselves and our perceptions of the world. At the same time, those individuals so influenced create the new historical realities that shape the coming generations. Think on this.

I will be using the descriptions as outlined by the groundbreaking sociologists and statisticians William Strauss and Neil Howe to maintain consistency of terms and interpretations.

Imagine an old 19th century surgical theater. Only in place of a patient, or cadaver, there is a moderator, standing at a podium. Think Alex Trebec from Jeopardy! fame.

Up in the gallery, not high up, mind you, perhaps eye level with the moderator, is a wide ranging group of people, sitting together by age cohorts. It is 2012 and the generations will be depicted as they are now, not when they were/are/will be at the height of their generational influence.

On the left, in a wheel chair and on oxygen, is our GI generational man. Educated, hardened in the fires of war, though his body is broken his eyes still hold the twinkle of confidence. On his left, also in a wheel chair, is a similarly broken old man. This one has a nurse and a helper monkey provided by Medicare for his use. His eyes are rheumy and his oxygen tank hisses slightly with pressure. This GI did not serve in the war, nor did he suffer in the Great Depression. He went into politics and ensured that his generation was taken care of in its old age. He is still on Federal Benefits, Full Social Security, and a government pension. He never saved for old age and never had to. He made sure that the nation provided for him.

There is a slight divider between the GI and the next fellow. This one is able to stand, though he sits in his chair, a cane hanging nearby. He is wearing a jogging suit and sipping on a shake that looks like it was made in a blender. He is a member of the Professional Silent Generation. Those who grew up in the shadows of those doing great deeds. He chats with the two GI's and swaps stories with them on how he saw them do this, and cheered them on when they did that. He also tells them about how he helped to carry on their legacy when the GI's left the workforce. Efficiency and maintenance were the watch words on the Great Deeds of the GIs.

To the right of him is another man. This one has is gray hair pulled back into a small pony tail. He is smoking a cigar and has a glass of scotch in one hand. He looks like a typical older retiree, bored out of his mind and with nothing to do. He has a paunch and a greasy, thin comb-over. With his free hand he rolls two marbles around in his palm, seemingly as some method of relaxing himself, though what stress he is under is not apparent to anyone save himself. He tries to talk to the Boomer next to him and share in his fun, but the Boomer seems to not even hear him.

In the next section, there sits a well-dressed member of the Boomer generation. His gray hair is combed and full, likely due to the heavy use of Propecea. In his hand is smart phone and a blue-tooth growing out of his ear. He appears to be monitoring stocks and looking over his retirement portfolio. Oblivious to everything around him, he is speaking loudly about wanting to get on his trip to Hawaii and for whoever is on the other end of the phone to just get his parent in the nursing home, or else he will stop payment on his check. This man is at the height of his power and he loves to display this. He is in the drivers' seat and the world will bend to his will.

Next to him, a fog-enshrouded individual tokes on something the size of a cigar, but obviously is not. Long, unkempt gray hair frames a wrinkled, abused face. A red bandana tries to hold the hair out his eyes and mostly fails. He wears a ripped up jean jacket and doesn't seem very aware of where he is.

Next to him, sits a man holding a small table fan, vainly trying to keep the stink and the smoke over in the Boomer box. This man is wearing a business suit. Not too expensive, yet not off the rack either. He appears to be a balance of spending and saving. In his eyes, you can see Stoic resignation to the state of affairs in the world. He is organized and efficient. He carries what he needs and works as hard as he needs to, then plays as hard as he works. He looks to be in his early forties, though his demeanor marks him as much, much older. He is not very talkative, preferring to sit quietly and take in the surroundings. This is our mainline Gen X'er.

Next to him is another fellow. His clothing is old and he has a beer in his hand. He too has that same, resigned look to his eyes and face. Life has been hard on him. Not because he never tried, but because things just never seemed to work out for him. The only thing that differentiates him from his more successful peer is a simple break of luck. If the factory had not gone out of business he'd still be working. If he were working he would not have lost his house. If he had not lost his house his wife may not have left with the children to start a new life with someone more successful. He now lives at home with his elderly parents and does his best to be useful around his old home. His unemployment ran out ages ago and it does not look like he will be working anytime soon. The older, more experienced people and the younger, more energetic and more recently trained (and cheaper) kids are now getting all the jobs. This is our typical adult Gen X'er.

Next to him is someone dressed in a sharp business suit. On a rack behind him he also has a triathlon outfit, a chef's outfit, a white lab coat, and a military helmet. This fellow exudes confidence and energy. He is young, mid-to late twenties, though he seems to have already had a lot of jobs, and a lot of life experience. He has a bluetooth in his ear, though it is not very obvious. To him it is not jewelry or a status symbol, merely a tool to be used. He has an iPad under his arm and an iPhone 4S at his belt. He is busy chatting with the other Millennial next to him, showing him how to get a group of people together for a Zombie walk at the local mall.

The younger Millennial is excitedly chatting away with the other Millennial and telling him how they organized a glow-bike run the other night. They did it to raise money for cleft-pallet children who lost their father to a land mine and who's mother ran off to try to get on the Opra television show from Uganda. He is wired to the Internet as well, though in a very casual and comfortable way. Various dings and beeps emit from a variety of devices that tell him, constantly, what others of his kind are doing, thinking, drinking, or where they are currently peeing while requesting an update on when the other friend plans on peeing.

Next to him are the Homelanders, those born after the 9/11 attacks of 2001. Their box is LOUD! The older one is arguing with the younger one about batteries for his Gameboy while the younger one is demanding a new computer for his bedroom, the bathroom, and his living room. He can not understand why he must put up with this stupid 5th generation iPod and where is his lunch and when does his mom get home and why does he have to go to bed early his friend in Germany does not have to go home early and neither does his sister. Why can't he have friends over and go to the movies after he goes shopping for new online games that he can install and why can't he have that on or this one he needs it he needs it he needs it and he also wants it and why are you being so mean and stupid!

The stage is set and the stereotypes engaged. Lets have some fun.

Our moderator coughs a bit to get the attention of those gathered. An air-horn is necessary to get the attention of the Homelanders.

The Moderator pulls out his first card:
"What is your opinion of current world events," lets start with you, GI's.

"Its all gone to shit. We worked hard to build up this world and send people to the moon and the Hippies have gone and blown it." This earns a, "Incorrect, sir," from the well dressed Boomer. The hippy just takes a long draw on his "cigar". The GI simply sits back in his chair and ignores the Boomer.

The well dressed Boomer goes on to say that resources had been misallocated and that the GIs wasted money on huge projects while the rich got richer and the poor got poorer. You can't eat moon rocks.

The other GI complains that the Boomers took out the money for Social Security and Medicare and the other programs that were put in place by the GIs. Why did they mess with those?

The Boomer retorts that they were putting the money only into themselves and that there were plenty of Boomers who needed that money.

By this time, the Homelanders are arguing about who is better on Halo. The Millennials have printed up graphs and charts showing how money has been withdrawn from various government accounts and how much has been wasted and how much has gone into Boomer pet projects.

The Hippie coughs on a long toke and starts giggling.

Both of the Silents attempt to critique the charts and offer suggestions on how to do it better while the Gen X'ers simply sit there, knowing that no one is listening to anyone else let alone them.

The Moderator bangs a gavel to get everyones' attention.

He blasts the air horn again to get the Homelander's attention again.

Next question: "Apple or PC?"

The GIs both say, "I don't like apples, I like oranges."

The sharp Boomer goes on about the versatility of the PC and how he helped the PC to dominate the computer world. The Hippie stirs, opens his mouth, but then forgets what he was going to say and then pops some white pill he found in his pocket.

The Millennials are divided but discussing the question rationally. Both have their strong viewpoints but decide that each viewpoint has validity and decide to work together testing the strengths and weaknesses of each.

The Homelanders both yell that they want BOTH of them and that it is their right to have both of them and stop being so mean!

The Gen X'ers look at each other and say, "Me'h. They both work. Who cares? Whatever is cheaper."

Brining the gavel down, the Moderator tries to get silence again. This time the Homelanders are so outraged that there are not PCs and Apple products in their booth that stagehands have to taser them to calm them down. While their limp forms twitched, shock collars were placed around their necks.

When they came to, they were delighted to see that they had been given something and then argued about who got the better collar.

The Moderator leaned on the red button and their arguing vanished in short screams.

With quiet again, the Moderator pulls another card. "What about the military?"

The elder GI wipes his nose and a tear runs down his cheek as he remembers the young men that never came back from Europe or the Pacific. The other GI goes on to say that he would have served but his draft number never came up. Anyhow, someone needed to keep things going on the home front while so many men were away fighting.

The Boomer screws his face up like a lemon had been stuffed down his nose. "A tool of oppression is what it is. Murderers and thugs, all of them. Only those that can't do anything productive with their lives join the military."

The Hippie stirs from within his cloud, "F**ki'n pigs. Kill them all."

The Millennial throws a medal at the Boomer and describes how he earned that in his 3 tours in Iraq and Afghanistan. The younger Millennial is exited about joining the military next year and is anxious to serve his nation.

The Homelanders begin arguing about who has the larger army in World of Warcraft online. Who has the bigger ships and meanest monsters. You can pay real money for icons in the game you know!

A quick tap of the red button shuts them up.

The Gen X'ers each hold up a few medals and achievements. The older one reminds everyone how they defeated Saddam in 1991 at the height of his power. How they went into the very TEETH of his army and whipped them in 100 hours of ground combat. They are ignored by everyone, just as they were in 1992 when they came home.

No one pays any attention as the Boomer and GI begin arguing about the role of the military in society. The moderator is speechless as the helper-monkey for the second GI begins to throw poo at the well dressed Boomer. The Millennial bounces a football off the back of the Boomer's head for dissing the GI who served in Normandy, even as that GI has seemly begun to nap in his chair. A blue tooth ear piece lands in the first GI lap waking him. He mistakes it for his hearing aid and starts to try to put it in his other ear. Failing that he pitches it over his shoulder against the wall, earning a scream from the Boomer.

The two Silents try to participate, but they are split. One side loves the GI while the other one seems to love the Boomer, who continues to ignore him.

Banging the gavel and tapping the button, the Moderator gets order in the theater.

Next Question! And stop with this fighting! The moderator appears to be shaken from the constant bickering, shoe banging, and poo flinging.

"The war on drugs, working or not?"

The GI with the monkey says that they are not trying hard enough. A few divisions of troops on the border will keep the drugs out, the CIA can assassinate the drug leaders, and nukes can be used to burn away the drug plants.

The Boomer goes into a fit about the environment and the innocent people who would be killed by the bombing and have their civil rights violated at the border.

The Hippie snorts and yells, "drugs, who has some drugs?"

The Millennials each stand up and declare that they will march wherever they are told to march.

The Homelanders begin debating which is better, "Modern Warfare 3 or Modern Warfare 2" and don't forget the zombie packs.

The Gen X'ers each seem to be of the same mind, much as they have been all day. Poor people in Latin countries grow the stuff, people ship the stuff and people buy the stuff. Break the chain, any part of the chain, and it will stop. Instead the money goes to into the politicians' pockets to the friends of the politicians.

This sets off the Boomer again who denies such facts and calls the Gen X'er irresponsible for stating such facts openly. The GI is reaching for a gun that has not been on his hip in 65 years and the other GI is flipping through his Rolodex to write a letter to a Senator that has not died or retired yet to complain about the War on Drugs.

The Moderator simply puts his hands over face and sits on the floor.

Above the din a single voice rings out, "I thought you said someone had some drugs, man?"

So there you go. Each generation acting according to its own life experiences. Shaped by history even while they shape history. The shaping of history changes the next generation in line and so forth.

You will note the Silents did not say much, nor did anyone pay them much attention. They turned out to be history's great Functionaries, but produced few visionaries. The Gen X'ers accept that life is not fair and that you just have to be tougher than the next guy if you want to get ahead in life. The GI's wonder what happened to the great nation they handed their children in the 1960's?

The Boomers dominated the discussion and had ALL the answers to any question asked. Theirs was the only right answer and anyone who had any other point of view were uneducated, misguided, and obviously racist.

The Homelanders are the new Silents. Spoiled and cared for. They know only that they want and don't care what YOU have to do to get it for them.

I hope this has been educational. Feel free to ask the Moderator any questions. I'm sure he'll get back to you, once they let him out of the psychiatric ward.

Live well,

--Zavost