Who is failing Whom?

From atop my perch at the Stoa today I have to wonder about those of the younger generation entering the workforce.

The Millennials have been entering the workforce since around 2001, professionally every year after that. I see that they are/were the first half of that generational cohort to enter the adult world. They are a good mix of what my generation was, plus the technological enhancements that have since come on the scene. They are good in teams, work well in large groups, know how to network, and can be pretty stubborn when they need to be. They are the ones fighting in 4 wars today and doing their best to live in a down economy.

There are others that are entering the workforce now, at least since 2008 or so, that are showing signs of progressive social dysfunction. The middling and last wave of this Millennial generation (cut off at 2001 and now called the Homeland Generation) have lost the social abilities that the early wave possessed. They have come to rely on electronic relationships so much that they fail the test of basic sentence structure, syntax, and eye to eye contact in a conversation.

Many have been sheltered by there parents to the point where they really do not understand how the real world functions. An HR director told me that increasingly, he is having to tell parents that NO, they may not accompany their college-graduated son/daughter to the big employment interview. They can not string a sentence together that is intelligible to other people and do not understand the impact of personal interactions.

They are socially awkward, rude (don't get me started), and unaware that there are others in this world that have feelings or needs. Humans are there to serve them and their needs just as their moms and computers have been since they were old enough to be aware.

In the workforce they tend to be apathetic and wondering where their raise and corporate car is after 6 months of employment.

On a personal note, they are the most drugged generation on record. When they show signs of stress or difficulty coping, they are proscribed anti-depressants. When they were children and were hyper, they were told they had ADD or ADHD and promptly put on drugs for that as well.

Are they a failed generation, this last half of the cohort? How have they failed, have they failed, and who failed them?

I think that the Boomers and Gen-X'ers have failed the ones that have honestly failed (not the ones that were destined to fail all on their own).

Boomers, on one end, have pampered and preened over their darlings (I'm talking about the early X'ers and Late Millennials) and told them how wonderful they are and how the world is just theirs to play in. They were never given goals or responsibilities so as adults they do not know how to formulate goals or show any kind of responsibility. Those X'ers then had late wave Millennials for children and passed on all the pampering and protection that they received from their parents. No lack of money, since the economy was booming for over 20 years, no lack of toys, electronic or otherwise. They got what they wanted when they wanted it. Now as adults they expect others to give them what they want when they want it. That things require money and work never really crossed their minds before. This goes equally for those later Millennials that come from late X'ers and Early wave Millennials themselves.

X'ers who had to fend for themselves in the 80's are raising, for the most part, good Millennials. They are being taught to stand up on their own feet and earn what they want.

Today's children are being told that they are dysfunctional. They are being told that they need medicine to be "normal", even when that child does not really know or understand what "normal" is any longer. How can they know? They are just kids. They watch programming that is adult in theme, but marketed at kids (think MTVs "Skins"). Just because they are 13 or 14 and look like they are 18 or 20 does not make them mentally mature. They are unequipped for the mature content and wholly unequipped to deal with it in the real world.

Let me hammer on this for a bit. Just because they look mature does not make them mature. The only thing that grants maturity is life and the experience that life grants us. Usually through trial and error...but mostly error.

You can not expect a 14 year old, that looks 18 to have the self-coping mechanisms to tell older boys, "NO", when they are being flirted with. They will fold under peer pressure and their social network unless they have a strong sense of personal identity. This is hard to develop while living in a wet fog of anti-depressants and psychiatric appointments. Likewise, you can not expect them to understand the ramifications of their parents' divorce the way that an older woman would. When that child shows stress, as even an adult would, they are given drugs. Drugs are not the answer for these kids. They need mentors and role models. They need navigators who will help them around the rocks and reefs of life especially when their parents are dysfunctional themselves or simply too busy to give them the attention they require. They need to make mistakes, but not catastrophic ones. They need accomplishments that are theirs and not hollow accomplishments to "make them feel good" (think trophies for being present). They need adults or older peers who can, non-threateningly, give them advice that they will feel that they can trust.

Parents used to fill that role, and still should. Where it breaks down, others need to step in. No, not the government, but friends and relatives. No judgement, just advice. Everyone has value. Everyone has worth. There is a role in this huge world for everyone, you just have to find it. Time wipes away most pain. It is a universal solvent for hope. If you live long enough, things change. It is up to you to shape that change in a positive way for you.

I love this saying by Dante, "Those that wait to be asked for help already half refuse." You don't have to wait to be asked if you see a need. Often times, people may be unaware that they need help, or they are simply too proud to admit that they need help. Shame is a powerful force. Disarm the shame and the personal defenses and simply be available for your friends and associates. Let them know that you will not think less of them if they need an ear to pour their troubles in.

Live well, everyone.

--Zavost

Who decides when an "Expert" is an "Expert"

From atop the Stoa this night, I ponder talent, experience, inherent ability, and how we all "know" someone is an expert.

When one goes into a Dentist's office or a Law office one sees a diploma, prominently displayed as proof that this person has gone through all the training necessary to BE what is written on that paper, to be recognized as a doctor or a lawyer. There are people who get those pieces of paper legitimately and others who don't, but I'll focus on those who earn it.

First, I'm going to think about those who are professionals. When you go to a dentist or a doctor, you place your health and your life into the hands of these people. However, like everyone I know, some got really good grades in school and some did rather mediocre. You would like to hope that you get the ace in every class for your care.

On one end of the spectrum you do have your Ace. The vast middle will be your range of "average". Then there are those that technically passed medical school and dental school and somehow passed their boards. These people ARE very smart, you can not get through those schools and not be smart. However, I like to think of these people as being "educated beyond their intelligence". In a narrower sense of the meaning of the phrase, others may use, "The Peter Principle". They are book smart and talk a good game, but for some reason, they just don't connect the dots the way other doctors or lawyers do. These are people that do not get pulled from the Yellow Pages before they hurt lots and lots of people. The trick, I think, is recognizing those people and exercising your rights as a patent and getting a different doctor. This goes for anyone with a medical degree from Medical Doctors to Psychiatrists. If you have your doubts, drop the class clown and look for the Ace.

I think about all the people in government who are "experts". Generally, those who work in government can not hack it in the real world. I'm not going to apologize to all government employees because of that last sentence. Live with it. Who made the people in CMS and the NRC the "experts"? The people in CMS are the ones who are running Medicare and Medicaid. They are on this QA/QC kick where they demand "results" that call for lower reimbursement. They generate rules and guidelines and then expect the medical industry to meet those rules or face reduced reimbursement. Who made them the experts? Why must hospitals listen to them? When was the last time they had to meet service expectations? When was the last time their work was scrutinized for quality outcomes? Love to see that myself.

Who are the economic "experts" that are CONSTANTLY caught off-guard when an indicator turns south? When my 13 year old daughter can listen to the news and tell me that she thinks now might be a good time to get out of the dollar, yet the "experts" are surprised and baffled that the dollar is continuing to fall makes me want to put my daughter in charge of the Federal Reserve System. She couldn't do a worse job, that is for sure.

Who are these employment "experts" that are CONSTANTLY surprised by higher rates of unemployment? Who are the ones that can't seem to figure out our population is growing and our employment levels are still dropping?

Why do they drink each others' kool-aid? Does the reality that the MSM want to push, along with the Administration bear any resemblance to the reality that exists? Practicing Perception Economics is something the Soviets did. Every 5 years the prior 5 year plan was declared a success and a new 5 year plan created to keep marching forward. Every year was better then the last...right up until it all fell in on them.

The experts I listen to talk of Hyperinflation. They talk of a devalued dollar. They talk of unemployment really running between 16 and 20% on average. Unemployment by ethnic or other values show even higher numbers than anything you would find in the MSM.

Lets all live in the land of what is and not what we want to believe. Face it Obama, Marxism does not work. It has never worked and never will. J. Maynard Keynes was a naive fool even if his work was not distorted to suit the needs of the Socialists in this country. On his deathbed he realized that Adams and Friedrich Hayek were likely correct. Think on that.

Live well.

--Zavost

Greek Tragedies

Oh, the Greeks and their history of drama. From atop the Stoa I watch the lines of people stream by towards the legislature buildings and the public square, the modern forum for public venting. The closer the people get to the building, the more violent, rude, and tragic they become.

This has been a banner year for Marxist and Islamofascist movements around the world. Mr. Obama seems to have been both the Herald and the Enabler to bring about these changes. I digress.

The Greeks have much to be proud of. They have a long...very long cultural history. Bronze Age Greece was destroyed by a bunch of Doric invaders from the North and in its place rose the most enlightened people to ever ask, "why". They acted as a Western pollinator throughout North Africa and the Middle East through the afternoon jaunts of Alexander the Great. They acted as a civilizing agent on the Romans when they took over the known Western World. Their presence and impact on modern civilization can never, ever, be minimized.

What a motley lot the Greeks have become today. Their ancestors would weep. As a culture, they pride themselves on their ability to doge taxes and to live within the 'black' economy, the unofficial economy. THEN, they complain and scream when their benefits are cut due to the lack of tax revenue. Does not sound very enlightened to me.

When the Eurozone was created, many countries in the South of Europe saw this as a way to escape a chronically weak currency. They were frequently devaluing their currency and occasionally defaulting on debt. Corruption was omnipresent, however, in all fairness, it is that way throughout Europe. They "made" the cut to join the Monetary Union and then went on a spending and borrowing binge, building what ever they wanted, where ever they wanted, as big as they wanted. Expanded benefits for all. Greece thought the Olympics would be a boom for the economy. They lost money. They chained and locked the buildings after the Olympics. They sit empty and idle. The square footage generating nothing but overhead for the Greek government. Unfortunately, this is repeated over and over throughout the country. Resort and hotel building lead to over building, shoddy building due to corruption, cost over runs due to corruption, and head aches for the people who trusted them.

They have grown used to spending other peoples' money, mostly German money, and now they have to live within their means. Mean old Germany does not like having to cut its own benefits while it pays for the Greeks to keep living on the German dole. No sir. It does not pay to make the Germans angry. You think the rest of Europe would have figured that out. But again, I digress.

What is saddening about this is that we have a proud people angrily protesting that they will not be allowed to live for free. That they need produce nothing for the society that they expect to keep them living comfortably.

You are in debt. Pay them off you deadbeats. You had better stay off my Dirtbag roll call. Getting into a financial bind happens to all of us from time to time. Intentionally living on the dole with no desire to be more than a parasite is degrading.

One must draw the conclusions that mixing Socialism and the Free Market do not mix. Even a little. Like a bribe that only grows, so too does entitlements. If you let them creep into your national budget, they will eventually wedge in deeper and grow. It must, since government spending is ultimately a political decision, and politicians ultimately wish to get re-elected. Therefore, entitlements will grow, in time, to become the bread and circuses to keep the masses docile. You can not do this forever. There will come a reckoning. The Soviet Union collapsed quickly because they did not even recognize the Free Market forces that were crushing them. China saw that coming to the Soviets by the end of the 1970's and decided to abandon Chairman Mao and forget about the 100 million people who died making China a Socialist/Communist nation. China is doing well, though for how much longer is not known. Western Europe was always more open to mixing their economies and it seemed to work well for a while, though what it lead to was a sclerotic economic model and routinely high unemployment. Immigration and multi-generational unemployment has now lead to the the meltdowns that are pulling the European Union apart.

The United States started slower but decided to drain the bottle in one gulp under Obama and now we are seeing what entitlements spending does to people. It destroyed the black nuclear family, it created multi-generational poor, the "projects", and unchecked immigration (to get the free goodies). Now we wrestle with the results.

Greece is the canary. Watch it closely along with Ireland, Portugal and Spain. What happens to them will happen to us as well, only on a much larger scale.

Oh, and Greece, grow up, shave, take a shower and get back to work. It is the only thing that will make your life better.

Live well.

--Zavost

America is still Great

The Doric column has been moved yet the Arena of Ideas is very large. From atop the stairs I still stand with my cane and listen to the vast river of humanity as it marches by.

Despite the gloom and doom that I see coming, and discuss from time to time, there is still much to enjoy in this country. It is still a very good time to be alive.

There is still high end jobs available if one is willing to move for them. This country has been famous for having a highly mobile workforce and it has helped us to maintain a strong economy. The housing market, since at least 2006 has limited this greatly. Families are tied to homes that have lost much of their value and can only be kept as long as their jobs do not change. If you lose your job, it is inevitable that you will lose your home as well. The only question is how long and how much will go down the drain before you simply walk away and let the bank eat it. Hey, that is why they were given a taxpayer funded bailout, right?

So, anyhow, the economy, for the time being, is still mobile. This allows talent to migrate around the economy and 'pollinate' new ideas with local means.

Technology and Social Media allow people to stay connected despite their physical locations. Not only does this allow friends to remain friends, even after a family move, but it allows business networking to pollinate regardless of location as well.

On a more personal level, The US is still great simply because of who we are as a collective people. While driving an SUV full of speed-talking, chipmunk-sounding, screaming teenage girls to their 8th grade dance is an honor that not many fathers are able to do in the world. In Europe, buses and trains (as in New York and Chicago) prevented this custom from developing. In Asia, Africa, and South America this concept is a rather odd thing to take in. In many of those cultures, Islam especially, girls going unescorted by male relatives is enough to get someone stoned.

The freedom to drive where I want, when I want is a uniquely American experience. I don't have to worry about kidnappers (I'm not anywhere close to Mexico), snipers, bombs in the road, or drug gangs getting between me and the girls' dance.

I can go to the supermarket and find just about anything I want. I can go to a doctor and have top notch care. I don't have to go to a witch doctor or subject myself to the purgatory of Asian medicine. I can have a moving company move my stuff across the country and they will not steal anything. My food is clean and relatively inexpensive (the inflation is killing me of late).

Despite all the bad things going on, I can enjoy the freedom to be driven insane by my daughter and her friends. Most dads would not look at it that way, but it gives one a unique insight into the modern teen age girl. They are much like other teen agers through the centuries though things move faster for them today then ever before.

So again, look for those moments where you can seek clarity in the world around you. Don't be so quick to get a goal accomplished or a task scratched off your to-do list. Be glad that you can do these things without worrying where your next meal is coming from or whether bad things will be done to you while you try to get this list done.

Sometimes, the best thing in life that you can strive for is to be bored. Thats what I aim for. Clarity of thought comes with serenity in your life. If you allow your life to be full of waves, then your thoughts will be as well. Calm your life and you will see more clearly what needs to be done and how to do it. Once that path has been started, life will greatly improve since you are now making fewer mistakes and fewer poor choices. It will become self-sustaining.

Re-read that last paragraph over a few more times and let it sink in.

This is enough, for now. Must break in my new seating step. My back-side is a little sore. Until next time.

Live well.

--Zavost

Yet more culture

Climbing the last step to the Stoa, I once again spot by number two student, Zacklego, spray painting my column with current culture. I wish to encourage the learning process in my class and if it means I must endure sophomoric popular cultural references then so be it.

This will be another installment of the Dirtbag, Putz, Symptom, or Patriot.

Item one:
The Song, "I wanna be a Billionaire" by Travis McCoy. I believe that if you ask anyone if they want to be rich, the overwhelming majority of them will stare at you for a moment and then say, "ahhhhhhmmmmmmah, yeah". Unless you are born to wealth, you must earn it. You must have a good, a service, or a skill that you can use to trade others for money. Granted, he is part of a group that put out a song about wanting to be rich. This will make them some money, but most likely we will be watching them in 2015 on "one hit wonders of the 00's".

I've got so say that this fellow is a symptom of declining culture. A good representative of this Millennial generation that wants fame and fortune after only getting started. Well, hell, after being told their whole lives how precious they are that can not seem to wrap their mind around the idea that they may fail in their endeavors or that you do not get rich, permanently, by doing something well once, twice, or even ten times. Life is hard and it will not thank you. Not now, not ever.

Popular Music. Boy, don't get me started. I am about to do what every father has done when the music of their children's generation is in full swing. I'm going to hate it and then complain about it. In the early 60's, the emergence of rock and roll was gutter noise to most parents. I have to agree. The music of the 60's and 70's sucked. It had some good songs, no generational music collection is without its redeeming qualities, but for the most part, it was irritating, illogical, and senseless. What should I expect will all the drug use? The music of the 80's was pertinent to my generation and sums up much of what I am about. The music of the 90's to the mid naughts was bland and talentless. Now that the Gen-X centric music has long since left the stage, the Millennial music is in its prime. The music tends to be excellent but the lyrics disgusting and inappropriate for most people, let alone children. I can't wait for the times to evolve and the new silent generation, the "Homelanders" begin to develop their own style. Hard to say if the music of today is a symptom of a declining culture, since every generation has felt that the changes were cultural-ending, but it sure does look that way when looked at in the larger context.

Zacklego has pointed out to me that it is my generation that, through video games, has introduced the Millennials to the music of the 1920's-1940's. The games of Fallout 3 and Fallout New Vegas. Both of those games have music from those decades and I have to admit, there is much talent and skill. It is not ground out of "boy bands" or ghost writers. Much of it was hard work and sweat. My number two student loves that music, and I know his Great Grandmother is happy for that. Their music has not vanished into the museums but is being enjoyed by tens of thousands of the new, mature generation.

I seek the good and the bad, in its totality. The kids today are also the ones fighting around the world without complaint. They know how to work hard and understand the value of money. Like all generations, they also have a segment that are wastes of DNA. It will be for the next two generations to tell us whether the kids today will pull us back from the brink or if they will be the enablers of generational doom.

Then again, change is neither good or bad, it just is. The establishment of a new normal. Let us hope that it is, for the most part a happy world. I sure hope so, since I will be an elderly generation when they are in their prime legislative and economic years.

Live well.

--Zavost

China Hacking

Atop the stoa, this night, I ponder the state of our intelligence agencies. I ponder the quality of the people we have, regardless of politics, who are tasked with protecting our cyber infrastructure.

Since the night is waning, I shall get right to it. Forwardness seems warranted here.

The Chinese have been attacking our cyber infrastructure for YEARS, denying every attack, despite most of the attacks coming from their version of the NSA. Riiiight. We complain, they deny, and then do it again ten minutes later.

Right now, the hacks mentioned in the news center around them trying to collar Chinese dissidents by hacking Google accounts and the like. The MSM does not mention the attacks against our military infrastructure, power infrastructure, and banks.

We complain, they deny, and then do it again. We tighten up our defenses and then they probe them again. We spend money hardening our sites and all they have to do is get more creative.

Has someone in the NSA or CIA figured out that all we are doing is training their hackers? In the meantime, it places a drain and drag on our business environment.

The Iranian nuclear power plants were crippled and delayed by a worm attack. This is foreshadowing of what I'm speaking about tonight. If a nuclear power plant in the US is hacked and has its cooling system shut down, are we looking at meltdown? In the very least there will be a drop in power on the national grid. What if there is a simultaneous hack on most of our nuclear plants, hacks on our coal plants, and major industrial systems? China has the manpower, the money, and the will to accomplish the task.

How about our national air traffic control system? Might cause some chaos, you think?

There is an old saying that people always train for the last war. The Chinese have a long memory and lots of smart, American educated computer engineers. They are currently equipping themselves to fight a conventional war, on the same level as the United States. At the same time, they are gearing up to launch, preemptively the next war upon the United States.

10,000 hackers shut off the lights, the phones, the Internet, civilian air travel, and our orbital satellite network. Simultaneous to that they will maneuver their military to seize whatever physical assets they feel they must possess, say Siberia? Watch out Russia.

In the old days, we were afraid that the EM pulse from a nuclear device above our airspace. That would accomplish the same thing, but in such an inelegant fashion.

I hope someone in the NSA and CIA are thinking about this, even a little. We must prepare for the next war, not the last war. Special ops, small covert forces, and "flexible" military strategies are not going to work with the Chinese. Liberal use of Tactical nukes and large, WWII style military formations are the only things that will work on a nation as populous as China. Once they have seized the assets of the Western Pacific, all of Eastern Russia, and dominate the orbital zones, there will be few other options.

Don't prove me right. Prove me wrong...I really, really don't mind being wrong on things like this.

Live well.

--Zavost

We are who we choose to be

From atop the Stoa today, I sit tapping my cane upon the flagstones. There has been much thoughtful discussion today with the class and the passers-by. I am frequently surprised by people who do not seem to know who they are or what their place is in the world. People who want...something, but don't know what. It frustrates them, it alienates them and it makes them, they think, do self-defeating and self-destructive acts to make their feelings become reality.

I have said it before but it deserves to be said again: Everything in our lives is both a choice, and our choice to make. The trick is to slow down and rationally evaluate your life and your life's choices. Some examples:

Adolescence is a tumultuous time for all of us. It helps to shape what kind of adults we are to become in the future. One's personality is likely set before they are six, but the physical and hormonal changes brought about by adolescence determine how we express our thoughts and feelings. Some teens grow from these experiences, but others seem determined to slide into darkness. I know that it is hard to think rationally when you are at that age, but if you do not, then you may find yourself an adult living a life that you wish you were not.

Personal responsibility. You are personally responsible for what bothers you and what does not. You will decide to allow a situation or a person's word to hurt you. Only you can allow another's actions to determine YOUR actions. Introspection and reflection are the tools to rational decision making. Develop these as you would any muscle.

I will use a typically dysfunctional family as a model to hang my discussion upon. You have a late 30's father, a late 30's mother, a 13 year old daughter and a 3 year old son. This sounds like the beginnings of an idyllic story. Let's say that neither of the adults went any further than a high school education and that they have struggled with finances their entire life. They have never owned a home, but have had to rent, thereby being denied the security of home ownership. Money was always tight and the addition of a daughter made things tighter. They never had the kind of car they wanted, nor could they take a vacation of their choice. Frustration builds and bubbles over time, raising the temperature one degree at a time until something melts down.

The mother decides to go back for a two year degree that will allow her a career that pays more than minimum wage, an attempt to bring some financial security to the family. Cars break down and the daughter has homework assignments.

Then a new child joins the family. Strained resources get even thinner. Rent payments are missed and the family has to move to a home on the charity of their families. The fathers dignity and confidence are shattered as he can not provide for his family. The mother grows frustrated and hopes for positive change that will allow her a measure of security for her young family.

Everything changes when the father decides to leave the family and hook up with another woman, severing himself as much as possible from the frustration and pain of living a life he never envisioned for himself. A desperate attempt at happiness that will end up causing more pain then he ever had to endure.

This article is for the children more than for the adults, though the principle is the same for either.

This young lady will likely be affected the hardest for the first few years, but the son will grow up dysfunctional as well. This is the time for rationality and not emotive reaction.

When the father left, he was not leaving the daughter, he was leaving the situation. She did nothing wrong. She did not do anything or say anything that made him leave. To be blunt, the man became a dirtbag by abandoning his responsibilities. He took an oath to remain with his family through the good times and the bad. The rich times and the poor times. He is a coward who himself never really grew up. He is acting like a child himself by avoiding the painful things in life in the hopes that things will be different, happier for HIMSELF.

She has the choice to either observe what has happened, learn from this so that she can apply what she knows when she becomes an adult, or will she decline into self destruction?

The mother must now deal with an absent husband, shortage of income, and two children, one of whom is old enough to react negatively to the unravelling situation. She must deal, herself, with the emotional wreckage of knowing that her husband is with another woman, but she must also work two jobs to keep the bills paid and food on the table. She will be absent at the time that her children need her the most. This is painful beyond measure for her.

Will the daughter recognize the plight of her mother and lend a hand in raising her young brother or will she turn into her own feelings and thoughts of inadequacy?

Each of those two examples, if dealt with introspectively, could have improved not just HER life, but he life quality of her mother and young brother. That is just two choices and already we could have a completely different life.

Whether she likes it or not, her brother needs her now more than he ever will. His personality if forming right NOW. His internal compass of good and bad are becoming set more and more with each passing month. She can either accept what has been dealt to her or she can ruin her brother's life along with her own; which if she thought about it, is irresponsible and unfair of her to do.

She must rely on her friends to provide the companionship that he is not and can not get from home. She must support her mother, who must be strong for everyone else, and help her brother. The world is full of girls on the street who come from broken homes and she need not become yet another one. She is an individual with worth and value. She can and will contribute to the world around her when she is an adult. She must go on to college and find her calling in life. Time. Time is the great emotional solvent. With enough time, the pain of childhood and adolescence becomes a tool of learning and not a source of ongoing pain. However, you must get to adulthood to be able to place your life within that context.

Now for some boring stuff.

Stoics believe that your conscience acts in harmony with god. When you are doing something you know is bad and it makes you uncomfortable, the that is your conscience resonating negatively with god's will. You know you are doing something that is bad, yet you will do it anyhow because you have created a bubble of lies around you justifying your own actions.

Negative feelings and emotions come about when you try to push against the natural course of things. When you feel bad, you act bad. When you act negative, negative things will happen to you. Like attracts like. Rebelling against the universe is ultimately futile. Working in harmony with the world, listening to your gut about right and wrong will greatly improve your future.

So, what in the hell does the last two paragraphs mean in the real world? Well, here is an example.

You know smoking is bad for you and that your mother will not like it, but you do it anyhow knowing that you will feel cooler around your friends and can irk the crap out of your mother. Revenge is an ill emotion for anyone. Revenge against someone who only has your best interest at heart is a futile expenditure of energy an emotion. It is also just plain wrong.

Acting out and causing trouble, changing your hair color every few weeks is a waste of energy. Get good grades, go onto college, and make your life your own life. Do not let your situation determine who you will be. You will be who you want and wish to be and it is YOUR responsibility to accomplish that. Your father will continue to mess up his life, your mother will go grey and toil in a thankless life to provide and your brother will feel left behind by a sister that he looked to for guidance when he was younger. He will have his own choices to make. It would be great if he had a positive role model to emulate.

As the great John Wayne once said, "Life is hard. Life is harder when you are stupid."

I say that your life is your own and only you can decide to succeed or fail. NEVER allow others to determine whether you will be a success or failure. We choose who we wish to be. Remember, not choosing is a choice, and it generally does not work out well for you.

Live and learn. Learn to love and to forgive. Be an island if you must, but do not let others make your life.

Live well.

--Zavost